Toxic
by CinnamonLace
Summary: [With the taste of your lips, I'm-] Levi is a teacher, for just a year, at Wall Rose public school. What does he do when shitty brats won't stop slamming the door, and what does he do when another shitty brat catches his eye; with that fucking awful haircut, and oddly pretty brown eyes? He runs. (Levi/Jean) (AU: school setting student/teacher) (Lots of queer)


AU: Levi is a teacher, and he loathes it. He just has to wait it out... One of his students is way too easy to speak comfortably to. LEVI/JEAN, (possible others)

A note that: This is based on the *Australian* school system, particularly private schools, because that is what I've experienced. That does not mean the characters themselves are Australian, or that this is set 'Down Under'!

"What a drag..." He growled under his breath, walking up the path in the Hell-like weather. Levi hated the heat. Trying to block out the annoying sounds of crunching gravel beneath his feet, he carefully observed his surroundings. Awful teenagers, just smiling and laughing, playing their shitty games on their shitty on their shitty phones or frantically doing the homework they didn't give a fuck about the night before.

Levi laughed bitterly, under his breath. He really fucking hated high school. Why was he there? Oh, he was there because of the worst reason possible. He had to teach these little shits /PE/. Maths he could've done, he'd get those nasty F students to at least a C by the year's end. But with Phys Ed... He was sure to get a few complaints.

'Heh,' he thought, 'Not like I'll be fired.' A friend of his made a stupid agreement with the head of staff, it ended up with Levi teaching /children/ for a year. Just one year. Which leads Levi to his first day of work, and his first time meeting the brats he'd be stuck with for a year. He pulled open door after door, hearing the bell signalling for you to walk to your first class come and go, then finally reaching the gym.

"Damn place's like a maze." Shit. The kids were already there. He almost failed to hold back a laugh, the uniforms were so ill-fitting on them. They must've been new. Or old, some looked rattier than others. Levi slammed his briefcase down on the makeshift desk, and pulled out a class list. He sat back comfortably on the chair, glaring down at the misshapen group of youth. He did a quick headcount, quite prepared to mark next to the names of whoever he deemed worthy of having an hour's long detention with Hanji Zoe.

12 kids a little spread out on a single indoors basketball court, and... 16 on the list. Fucking teenagers. It's never easy. He was going to wait ten seconds until the second bell rang. He clicked his pen in time with the clock, counting down seconds.

He had gotten to four clicks left, when the door burst open and the missing four burst into the hall. The last one, a brunet, slammed the door behind himself, and Levi glared like the boy had just murdered something cute. The slam was bone-shatteringly loud, he wouldn't be surprised if people in another hemisphere heard it, or felt it.

"Sit the fuck down." He half-yelled half-spoke, not wanting to be too loud, in case any other teachers heard. The brunet slumped onto the ground next to two of the people he came in with, and held his hand up high.

Before even waiting for a nod, he blurted out, "Teach, you're not supposed to swear at us."

"Let's make this easier for all of us. I don't give a shit, you don't give a shit, let's make this year as painless as possible." The kid quietened, but looked a bit sulky. Heh.

"My name is Levi. But all you'll be addressing me as is sir. Got it?"

Levi looked back down at the list, carefully reading the names. He decided to do it out of order, just to freak them out a bit. Something different, they'd been answering the same fucking thing over and over for years.

"Marco."

Immediately a couple of them had some odd looks on their faces. Brilliant. A boy in the back jabbed the kid next to him in the side, and the jabbed-boy yelled out...

"P-Polo!"

"..." Levi had to resist choking up with every ounce of his being. He covered the bottom half of his face with his left hand, hiding the tiniest smile to ever grace the Earth.

"Eren."

"Yo." The annoying brat spoke up. Now he knew which kid to keep a close eye on. Anyone who slams the door that hard can't be trusted easily.

"Armin."

"Here!"

"Jean."

"Good morning sir."

Levi raised an eyebrow. Suck up.

"Annie."

"Here."

"Mikasa."

Ackerman? Hoh.

"Good morning." She squinted. She obviously didn't like her new teacher.

'That's okay.' Levi thought. 'I'm sure I'll find a reason to dislike her back.'

"Sasha."

"Here!" Sasha tried to choke out a here between her potato chips, but utterly failed, and Connie broke out his piercing falsetto to be her replacement, while Mikasa offered her some water.

"Reiner."

"Here." ...He looked too old for this class.

"Connie."

"Heh, here!"

"Bertholdt."

"I'm, uh, here."

Levi's thoughts kind of skipped over the rest of roll, he didn't really care about these kids, he just had to get their nmes marked down so he didn't have to talk to the principal. He stood up, and dumped his suit jacket on the desk. Hope these kids like laps.

"Five laps of the court. Now. I'm giving you four minutes." The class looked at him like he was insane, but Levi just rolled his eyes and tapped his wristwatch pointedly. He could hear quiet groans, but they were off.

He watched them, this lesson he'd probably decide which students he liked, and which he needed to give more laps too. He internally grinned at the power he felt ordering the kids around. Maybe he wouldn't be too harsh on them.

He could let them off later, now he wanted to show class 104 where their place was. Door slam, scarf girl and blondie were running together, scarf girl looked like she wanted to run faster but the casual pace of door slam and the other one kept their little group in the middle of the class.

The buff guy, suck up, his 'polo' friend, an oddly sweaty and oddly tall dark haired boy were running fairly fast, ahead of the rest of the group, but they kept a cautious distance of Annie, the quiet blonde with the hooked nose that reminded him of Hanji. He didn't understand why she was wearing a thick white hoodie and jeans for gym, it made Levi feel like he was going to faint from overheating by just looking at her run with that determined look in her eyes.

He didn't have to worry about them at all, so he shifted his gaze to the back of the class where-... A girl had stopped running and had started eating a packet of potato chips.

Fire burned in Levi's eyes as he began walking towards her, planning to throw her shitty chips in the garbage right in front of her, and them make her do laps for the entire lesson.

"Oi."

"Hahh?" She turned her head to look at Levi, and stared for a moment. Her eyes suddenly widened and she stuffed the packet of chips into her shirt.

"Too late, kiddo. I saw those. Give me the chips." Levi held out his hand and glared. She whimpered and frantically wiped the crumbs off her face.

"Chips, sir? Haha, what chips? Computer chips? I have a USB in my bag if you want to borrow one-"

"Laps. Do laps until you fucking drop. You have a detention with Mr. Smith during lunch today, you won't be getting any food. I could give you another one tomorrow, if I wanted." His glare hardened. "Unless you want to give me those chips and clean your mess up off of the floor."

"My...?" Sasha looked down at her feet. Mess? What was he talking about? There were a few crumbs on the ground, but...

"Now."

"Ehh..." She pulled the chips out of her shirt, snorting at the catcall from Connie, and handed the man the packet. "You can have some if you'd like..." She attempted a grin, but it wavered when she looked her gym teacher in the eyes.

A few hours later, all he could really remember after that was giving door-slam and suck-up a detention for having a fist fight in class (it was over a dumb game of dodgeball). He would've liked to have gotten at least door-slam suspended, but it wouldn't have looked good for Levi if he gave someone a suspension on the first day back after Summer break. 'They've just started in a new year, I know it's hard for you but you have to give them a chance...' and all that shit. Gross. He was on his lunch break now, with Hanji, the English teacher (was Petra her name?) and Erwin.

"...So that's why I can't do those detentions this afternoon. Shame, isn't it? I was looking forward to making them clean up the lab-"

Levi looked up, faster than lightning. "Hah? What was that about the detentions?"

"Boo, Levi, you weren't listening to me! I have to go to a conference the next town over this afternoon, for a couple days too. So I won't be able to do my detention duty this afternoon, and I'll need Moblit to sub for me for a few days."

"What shitty conference do you need to go to, that's more important than keeping your labs clean?" He tried to appeal to Hanji's interests, maybe that would make them reconsider. He didn't want to look after the brats for longer than he had to, he had valuable couch-time and work-out time that he needed to attend to.

"I said that ages ago too... You're ignoring everything I say today, aren't you? Are you thinking about something?" They frowned. "I'm going to a conference to discuss the changes that are being made to the science curriculum this year. A lot of the in class experiments I want to do might not be authorised because of some new rules."

Hanji sighed and thought longingly about the titan beetles they were going to get the class to breed and observe. Some of the students that look the class were terrible about Hanji's beloved bugs, the experiment ended with a lot of crushed beetles, and Professor Zoe's broken heart. They vowed to themselves that things would be different this year, if only those damn higher ups would let them import the beetles.

Levi frowned at the determined look on his almost-friend's face. It didn't look like he was going to be able to get out of the detentions. Erwin cleared his throat and began to speak.

"Levi, since Hanji isn't able to supervise detentions this afternoon, could you attend to them? I know it's just your first day teaching, but I think you can handle the ankle-biters. And there isn't anyone else, after all."

...There it was. The worst news Levi had heard all day. He slumped in his chair a little and sighed, reaching out for another teabag.

"I s'pose I'll do it. Four-eyes, want me to make them clean your labs?"

The brunet grinned and gave Levi a thumbs up, before biting down into their burger. Great. What a day. He drank his second cup of tea (black, of course), and sighed. He had an hour left of sitting around, and then another hour of looking after shitty brats.

Levi leaned against SC02, Hanji's science classroom, waiting for the brats. He had to look after 3 kids that afternoon, Door-slam, Suck-Up, and some kid, Hitch, was it? He didn't really care. He wanted this hour over as fast as possible.

Jean Keirschtein turned the corner in the corridor at a casual pace, thinking about his day. Of course he'd get a detention on the first day, he thought, grumbling a little. It was all Jaeger's fault. If Eren hadn't called him out when Jean had /clearly/ caught the ball, his team would've won the game and he wouldn't be having this stupid detention.

Jean was sure of himself, but definitely not arrogant, and liked to think that he was at least of above average intelligence. He liked sport, was on the school's football team, and had the stupidest haircut that his 'BFF' Marco could've cut for him. Jean didn't care, he liked it. At least he didn't have a bowl cut, like his dad always wanted him to have. That's the reason Jean never lets anyone see any pictures of him from before his tenth birthday.

The blond-ish teen planned on walking to detention slowly, so he didn't have to spend much time there. The school was only allowed to keep him until four in the afternoon, and he wouldn't be staying even a second past then. He glanced at his shiny (but cracked) iPhone 4 to check the time.

"Three twenty-two... I've made good time." He whispered to himself as he turned yet another corner, finally reaching the science rooms. Jaeger and another student were already there, and Levi glared at him.

"You're late."

Jean frowned. He felt like Levi was trying to command him to do shit. Jean didn't approve. But he had to go along with it, if he didn't want to end up like Sasha. He involuntarily shuddered at the memory of her dead-looking face when she had finished with Levi's punishment.

"Sorry... Had to talk to a teacher about something we did in class today." Levi squinted, obviously disbelieving, but he turned to unlock the door. He glanced back as he walked in, and waited at Hanji's desk for the kids to follow.

"By the time you leave this room will be spotless. Not a single spec of dust. If it takes until after four, so be it. You'll have to come back in tomorrow afternoon to re-do it." The raven smirked. "Tomorrow the grade 8s are dissecting frogs. They're a messy bunch, they are, I heard the last time they dissected something there was blood and guts all over the floor. Disgusting, really."

That sure shocked the kids into responding. They moved into the room a little faster, and picked up whatever they needed to clean with. Now, Levi was just making up the story about frogs being cut open. But he enjoyed the looks of terror on their faces when the clock ticked closer to four pm.


End file.
